Seal the Deal

Hi Friends,

This post has been a long time coming. I’m not sure why I haven’t blogged about this sooner, so I am sorry for the wait.

Remember Camera Man? I believe my last post ripped him to pieces because he wanted to play games? Well, that was my bad. I’m the idiot who sent him the wrong phone number…I guess that is what happen when you are working out and sending messages at the same time. Damn multitasking skills. Anyway, so once I realized my mistake, I did send him a text.

We texted sporadically through out the day. By that night, he was like “Hey…add me on Facebook.” I was like “Hey…I don’t even know you.” He said the reason why was because he “had a lot of stuff about his business on his page.”

This isn’t freshman year of college anymore. I don’t add 500 people because I think I am going to be friends with him and meet them at parties. This is real life. Once I shut him down on that, he kind of shut down. You think my comment of “we don’t even know each other” would have maybe sparked a thought of…”hey let’s get coffee?”

So, I have since stopped talking to Camera Man.

Last weekend, I was in DC. Glorious, pre-government shutdown DC. Upon getting off of the metro, I met up with my friend, and we began the walk to our hotel. On our journey, we met up with a flight crew sitting outside for happy hour. The guys (pilots) were basically hitting on us….”we want to go out tonight…what is there to do” “where are you girls from?” “Ohio…I was born in Akron!” It was honestly about 15 minutes of talk. Even the nice flight attendants were trying to push them in the right direction. Honestly, if they would have asked, I would have sat down right there and have them buy me a drink and dinner. It was a fancy restaurant… who would have said no. So, after 15 minutes of useless chatter, my friend and I walked away.

Honestly men, my plea to you is to up your game. Seal the deal. Don’t just talk…do something.

As for the update on the actual dating life…there is really nothing. I’ve winked, I’ve chatted in email conversations that receive no chatter back. It’s kind of sad, but that’s the way things go sometimes.

Here’s to hope. Here’s to sealing the deal.

Cheers.

XOXO. Damsel

Games

Hello friends!

I have to admit that I am a little annoyed as I write this blog post. I haven’t even started to date anyone and I am already sick of the games the men like to play. Ugh….seriously. Why can’t men just do want we want them too!? The world would a happier, although less exciting/ challenging place.

Reason # 1 for for being annoyed: Remember the banker from way back when? Traveled, was getting his MBA…seemed to be a pretty good match on paper. We emailed back and forth, texted a few times… and then nothing. Well, I was creeping on who viewed my profile. Guess who? Seriously, if you have to creep on me, why don’t you just text me?

2. I’ve been emailing back and forth with this guy since Friday. Let’s call him the Camera man. We’ve been getting to know each other through fun questions like “If you were a super hero, what super power would you want?” and “If you were a sandwich, what would you be and why?” Interesting, freshman year ice breaker questions. Today, he goes….” Do you want to text….insert Camera Man’s phone number here.?” I respond with “Sure… insert my phone number.” Instead of texting me, he responds with…”Ha. No you text me. Insert his phone number here…again.”

No. You text me! He, friends, is almost 30 years old. If you call this a flirt tactic, I am not feeling it at all. It is a game…and I just don’t want to play this game.

If he wants to talk to me, he can text me. Again, he is almost 30. Show some maturity.

I asked my brother and he goes ” All guys do that. Just text him and say Hey! It’s Lauren….but do hey with 2 y’s.” Yes…that is my 19 year old brother’s advice. His advice to me is to also go on JDate.

Time to wait and see how this game pans out.

Cheers.

XOXO. Damsel.

Sometimes, all you need is a little encouragement.

This blog post is dedicated to Bunny, who without her encouragement, there would be no blog post.

 

Sorry for the delay on this friends, but I guess I wasn’t completely out of my funk like I thought I was. I think I have turned the page though. 

 

Yesterday, September 12th, my sorority sister Bunny posted on my Facebook wall a little perturbed that I hadn’t blogged in a long period of time (i.e. one week). It’s true. I hadn’t blogged in a while. It’s just that I had nothing to blog about. Work has been like a roller coaster. Anytime I think I know what I am doing (up hill), I only find out that I have done it completely wrong or a new twist I didn’t know about comes along. Ah, the joys of a new job. Add on top of that family issues and just not feeling the online dating thing, I wasn’t on the site for a week. 

 

But, with Bunny’s persistence, I finally tickled the keys, and logged back on. I didn’t really do much last night. Look around at my matches, who has viewed my profile, but I got back on. It was a start.

 

And then…we turn the Friday the 13th. 

 

A lot of people get freaked out by Friday the 13th. I, however, have had nothing but good days on Friday the 13ths (know on wood, shouldn’t I). Today, I believe that tradition carried on. I woke up, it was Friday, I got to wear jeans and a super sassy jacket to work, it was doughnut Friday…I was just feeling it this morning. Nothing can beat the feeling of a sassy jacket. A girl will totally understand what I mean. 

Today, instead of just looking around at my matches, I actually winked at men and e-mailed them! And, I got responses. Who would have though!? 

 

I e-mailed 2 of the guys that e-mailed me last week…that I never responded back to. Oops. I was “that girl.” We always hate “that guy” for doing that…and I just did it. Maybe I’ll be a tad bit more understanding next time…

 

And then, I e-mailed 2 other guys! 

 

Like my beloved Pittsburgh Penguins, I am back in the game my friends. 

 

As I hit here writing this blog post, blasting “22”, I am just reminded of the beauty of friendships. Friendships are what get us through the hard times and involve some of our favorite memories. Without friendships, we would never be able to get through a break up (who else would provide the Ben & Jerry’s?!)…and they also help us start other relationships.

 

And that is where I end tonight. 

 

Cheers. 

 

XOXO Damsel. 

That’s What Friends Are For, Right?

Hello Friends!

 

Sorry it has been so long. But, honestly, N O T H I N G has happened. I repeat, nothing. 

 

And that, is a problem. As my mother told me last night, I am “not getting my money’s worth.” Which, she is actually true, but that is beside the point. 

 

Anyway. so here is the super depressing update:

The Banker: Things were promising. We exchanged phone numbers, but he never responded. After a day of playing the “I am acting too desperate” game with myself, I finally decided to put my big girl pants on and text him. The texting went quite well for a day. The next day, not so much. The day after, nothing. And, there has been nothing ever since. I guess the bank is closed.

 

The Teacher: We were chit chatting about the books that he was reading (as my trashy romance beach reads are nothing to brag about). He then asked me how my weekend was going, and well, that was the last in that. I guess school is back in session or something. 

 

The Engineer: This one was a true winner, lasting all of 4 or so conversations back and forth. And again…there has been nothing for over a week. 

 

Great stuff, huh? Don’t you worry though, there is still plenty of drama. 

 

After all of these failed conversations and matches that just didn’t seem to be the right match, I kind of went into an online dating funk. I knew it was there, I looked at it, but I didn’t do anything. It just seemed that all of my matches are living an “active lifestyle” (which I am attempting to do..but let’s face it, aren’t we all?) or their hobbies included hunting and fishing (which is great, but so totally not me). 

 

So, the funk began. And my confidence drained. There were no “winks” or likes to even make me feel attractive and pretty. That though, is where the reinforcements come in!

 

Last night, I texted my 2 sorority sisters, Meredith (Merri) and Margot. I told them about my funk and they offered supportive advice. It helped, but it didn’t totally do the trick. I had a thought, and laughed it off…and continued to be in a semi-funk. 

 

Today though, the fog lifted, the the funk dissipated. I was wearing a cute, new dress. My hair looked pretty decent. I was coming off of a 3 day weekend, and I told my coworker my idea and she thought it was pretty good. With a vote of confidence, I sent my idea to Merri and Margot. They agreed to it. 

 

My idea: Give Merri and Margot my username and password. Let them check out my matches and start the conversations that I was too chicken to start. Have another perspective take a look, because I will admit that I have been a bit too rigid with my specifications or just a plain wuss. 

 

So, here is to Merri and Margot! Let’s see if you can spice up my love life!

 

I totally owe then a pitcher of margs!;-)

 

Until next time!

 

Cheers. XOXO Damsel

Another One Bites The Dust

Well, as you can probably tell from the title, I’ve let another one of my potential suitors go. I think that this one of for the better.

Yesterday over dinner, I was giving my mom the daily update. I proceeded to read her the new e-mails that I had received throughout the day. But, before we get into that, I need to back track just a bit. I should also probably throw in a disclaimer. 

 

I had received an e-mail from the Jewish suitor the night before. He proceed to tell me that I am pretty cute. I thought, oh, how nice! I mean, that’s not something that I hear every day (sadly). I responded back, answering his questions/continuing the conversation and finished with “Thank you for the nice compliment.”

 

Not too long after I replied, he replied back with “You’re welcome. 🙂 What do you think of me?” That’s it. Nothing else. 

 

Disclaimer: This has nothing to do with people of the Jewish religion. Some of my family is Jewish and my brother has gone to Israel. This blog is about my journey to find love. 

 

Back to the present: After reading that post, I instantly got a bad feeling in my stomach. That comment just didn’t sit with me right. But, I didn’t want to be too quick to judge, so I instantly called one of my best friends Lexie. The minute I explained the above story to Lexie, she went “Ooooh. Nooo. He’s insecure and will constantly be fishing for compliments.” That made me feel much better, and I went ahead and sent my Jewish suitor an e-mail saying that I am not interested.

 

He sends me an e-mail saying, “I got an e-mail saying that you aren’t interested any more?” Uh, yes, yes you did. 

 

I talked to Catherine and Diana at work this morning. They didn’t agree with my theory and they didn’t see anything wrong with it. I instantly felt bad and thought that maybe I did make the wrong choice and thought way too much into the situation (which I tend to do basically all of the time). 

 

Once I had talked to them, I e-mailed Hannah. Hannah agreed with Lexie. And lastly, I talked to Jake to get his take on it, or the “bro code.” Jake again agreed with me. 

 

So, after the whirlwind of today, I do feel as though I made the right decision. Yes, maybe I am judging these guys too harshly, but they are judging me right back. I’ll find the right guy, I just may have to kiss a lot of toads first. 

 

Gotta go. My computer’s dying. 😉

 

Cheers! 

 

XOXO. Damsel.

Creeps

Hello Again Friends! 

 

Well, I’ve been back on the online dating scene for a few days now, and here is the update I have for you:

After being on the dating site for less than 12 hours, I received a message from a man. He stated the following:

“Hey gorgeous!!! I think that you are beautiful and I would love to take you out on a special date sometime. You’re gorgeous and I’m a working professional! What an awesome combo!”

This same man was wearing a scarf in his picture (which I happened to like, but no one else did…) and he was also “looking for an angel.” 

First of all, I have never been asked out on a “special date” before. I feel as though a special date can be one of 2 things.

1. A wonderful date at one of the best restaurants in town complete with a bottle of wine. 

2. My name and face are all over billboards stating “Have you seen this girl?”

 

I talked to one of my male coworkers today. He said that a guy would never say let’s go out on a “special date.” He said, maybe after 2 years of dating a girl. I also told him what a special date would sound like to a girl that you have been dating for 2 years. Needless to say, a “special date” is a red flag in bro-code.

I have also gotten hit on a quite a few men. I must say that it is flattering and a confidence booster than men like the photos that I spent a good time analyzing that I look my best, fun, happy, and pretty in. What is not flattering though, is the fact that men a bit above my age limit are hitting on me. When I say above my age limit, I mean mean that are 35, 37, 40, and 41 to name a few examples. 

 

But, seriously!? Men 12-18 years OLDER than me are hitting on me!? They also message me:

 

“Hey! I think that we have a lot in common, let’s get to know each other.”

 

Uh, let’s not. And, how can we have a lot in common!? You could almost be my dad!! 

 

There have been a few winners. 

 

I’m currently talking with a few men. One is a banker who has done some traveling. So far he is the winner. 

Time will tell my friends! I’ll be sure to keep you updated!

 

Cheers!

XOXO Damsel

 

I’m Back!!!

Long time, no talk friends! It’s good to be back though, I have to say that I have miss you!

 

As you may or may not remember, I abruptly stopped my online dating social experiment, quest for love, and my blogging in March. It got too much. Things were getting too real. I’m sure you’re confused by that comment, as the whole point of online dating is to meet real people and go out on real dates. The last time I did this, I was on an online dating site for 2 1/2 months. During that 2 months, I did not go out on one date…it was just continual online talk and the occasional text. When things actually got real, and I had scheduled my first date, I couldn’t do it. Maybe it was the wrong person, maybe there was too much conversation before I actually went on the date, but whatever it was, I freaked myself out way too much.

I am sure that those emotions are still there, but over the past 4 months, I have grown up a lot and learned a lot about myself. During the time I was doing my first online dating experience, I found out that my job was being outsourced to the Philippines, my dad  was in terrible pain because of nerve damage in his back, and my brother was gallivanting across NYC begging me to buy him Chinese food. Since March, my job has been outsourced complete with a fabulous trip to the Philippines, my dad has had back surgery to fix his nerve damage, my brother is back and home and playing hockey (which if you know me is awesome!!), I learned to play golf, and I stumbled upon a new job and start it in a week.

With all of that turmoil and craziness behind me, and a friend’s wedding before me, I decided to start up my social experiment again. Friends have encouraged me, my aunt has been bugging me to online date again (with her mantra being “If I can do it, you can do it.”), and well, I have been kind of bugging myself to take another crack at it. 

 

As we all know, you learn from your mistakes. I learned from my mistakes last time. This time will be different. I am using a different online dating site this time, and from the 24 hours that I have been on it, there are a lot more people in my age bracket. There is going to be a bit less online conversation and hopefully a few more dates than last time. Yes, it is great to “get to know one another,” but it may also be good to just dive right in. 

As fate would have it, Ellen has also rejoined the online dating world, and I am heading to Hannah’s (who has since left my company for a new job) house today for some wedding crafting (it’s her wedding whose has pushed me backed to online dating ;-)) who will help me sort through my first set of matches like the good old days. 

 

Here we go again friends, I hope your ready for the ride!

 

Cheers!

XOXO, Damsel.